Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad may be headed to space one day, if a recent public statement is to be believed. Speaking at an exhibition of Iran's space achievements in Tehran, the Islamic Republic's president said he would be the first human launched to space aboard an Iranian rocket, the Mehr news agency reported. "I am ready to be the first human to be sent to space by Iranian scientists," Ahmadinejad said.
The comment came just a week after Iran launched a live monkey into space inside a capsule named Pishgam ("Pioneer" in Farsi), which was lofted aboard a suborbital rocket. "Sending living things to space is the result of Iranian efforts and dedication of thousands of Iranian professional scientists," Ahmadinejad said, according to the Mehr news agency.
Good thing ‘professional’ Iranian scientists are doing this. Don’t want any rank amateurs running this show.
Iranian officials said the monkey's launch was a scientific precursor to sending humans to space, though international experts have been skeptical, worrying that the same rocket technology used in these experiments could be applied to launch ballistic missiles carrying nuclear warheads.
So, if Brave Li’l Ahmie is to be believed, he has no desire to do this:
But does his trust his bosses, the Mullahs? What are their intentions? There has always been a little friction between them. What better way to get rid of him and take out a Satan or two? Convince him he’s taking a nice pleasure cruise into low earth orbit, and then…
...ground control to Major Kong.
Ahmadinejad dismissed those concerns and said Iranian scientists should be on the lookout for international sabotage efforts on its space program, according to the Mehr news agency. "We should admit that some [powers] do not tolerate Iranian greatness and growth. Iranians [have] incited devils' hatred by Iranian idealism, perfectionism, and being human," he said.
Yep,yer right about that little buddy. Nothing pisses off Big Enos and Li’l Enos…er… the Koch brothers.. er.. I mean them there Satans (Great and Small ) more than nit-picking Islamist utopian perfectionists and ‘being human’. Shoot yeah. No one likes a perfectionist. Being human? That’s the straw that broke the back. Know what I mean? Keep it up with all that who-ha, and we’ll sick Gary Seven on ya’ and Terry Garr. They have some missile sabotage skills.
If Ahmadinejad does eventually go to space, he will not be the first Iranian to do so. That distinction is held by Iranian-American engineer and entrepreneur Anousheh Ansari, who paid to visit the International Space Station aboard a Russian Soyuz spacecraft in 2006. She was the first, and so far the only, female space tourist.
Exit question: Suppose Li’l Ahmie does get his wish. And suppose he's stranded out there, with no way home.
It’s very lonely out in space. In fact it’s cold as hell.
He’d better take along a friend.
Why, Official Iranian Salute Guy of course.