Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Hop on over to Uncle Binnie's Bunny Ranch. The Paks HAD TO KNOW.

The denials from our erstwhile friends the Paks are reaching Nathan Thurm levels of 'ridiculosity'.

The Ultimate "Captain Louis Renault Award" the all-timer, must go to Pakistan.

Pakistan, you stretch our credulity. The fortress in "hey-Abbottabad!" stuck out like the Klopek place in "The Burbs":

If a 12 year old can notice the oddity, meet the fam, and receive candy and bunnies as gifts, don't tell us, with a straight face, the local Pakistani crack squad of keystone cops, the Pak military, the ISI and Presidents (Musharraf and the present tool) didn't have a clue there was something fishy about this heavily guarded compound with security lights, conspicuous lack of visible opaque windows, strange comings and goings, no trash generation, which was also many times larger than any structure save the military academy down the road. Built around 2005, for the express purpose of hiding in plain sight...Come on. Do you think we are that stupid Pak?

A 12 year old, you say?

Take it away Eyewitness News:

But wait, there's more!

Two Pakistani men came out every day to do the shopping, often buying bulk orders of Pepsi, Coke, Nestle, and other major brands. The residents burned their garbage in order to avoid having it collected.

Nice to see Uncle Bunny couldn't make up his mind about the Cola Wars. (However, the call is easy. Coke) Seriously, why are you drinking Great Satan's Sodas anyway? And Nestle hot chocolate? Hardly the drink of a brave warrior. You might as well drink a Singapore Sling..oh wait..the alcohol thing. My bad.

But, then again, to make up for that foo-foo, maybe Uncle Binnie's been training up them bunnies sumpin' fierce:

Yes. That must be it. Not all the rabbits were cute and cuddly. Hidden behind the battlements; The Beast.

“When we played cricket in the field near the house, if the ball flew over their wall and we went to the gate to ask for it, the guards would be angry,” says a local teen, adding that the guards would give them money to buy a new ball rather than allow them into the compound.

Cue the local yokel Crack Pakie Keystone Kop police force: "Nothing to see here...move along kids...move along."

Now, I'm sure there is some consistent story according to which the local town council and inspectors were sold a bill of goods by the mysterious builders of Uncle Binnies' palatial digs, maybe they claimed the place was going to be a local franchise of Del Stater's Rabbit Hut, and I suppose that the lights and sirens, killer rabbits and menacing looking dudes could have been interpreted as a mere protection of the Del Stater Rabbit Hut Empire's investment, but really Pak.

You have to do better than that.

6 years right under your nose in this particular neighborhood full of military retirees, political honchos, and just down the street from your West Point wanabee institution.